we've taken a step back..... This past Saturday I went in to get an ultrasound because my AF finally, finally, came through.
The cyst on the left ovary has disappeared--great! But now, on my right ovary, a small cyst has developed-- F!
It was a different doctor that did the ultrasound and I like him alot more than the other two doctors that I've seen at the clinic. His bedside manners are awesome, he takes the time to actually talk with you about your situation making you not feel so rush and just another patient. I felt like I was his one and only patient.
I worked the night before and was running on two hours of sleep. As we were sitting in the doctor's office and as he was explaining to us what our options should be, I could feel the tears well up. I tried the best I could to hold it back, and I guess it was good that I did, but I'm not sure if it was good. I ended up crying in the car on the way home.
Why?
I'm on birth control pills to hopefully make the cyst disappear.
Now, I wait until the last week of May to do another ultrasound and see if the pill did its job.
The bright side about all of this (I guess), is that we can go and celebrate our wedding anniversary this weekend out of town.
Yesterday was a bad day for me. I was overwhelmed with sadness as soon as Mr. Dubyah left for work in the morning. Not sure why, but my guess is that my frustrations of trying to get preggers is starting to reach its maximum.
Every time I would even talk about how depressed I was, tears would well up in my eyes and I would lose it. Just lose it. I'm starting to think that maybe I should seek my work's EOP and see a therapist.
So, I took off to a friend's house who is also going through the same thing as us, except she's more put together than I am. I'm a wreck! Her calmness and her lending ear helped me tremendously. It's good that she also has a little dog to play with Maddie whom isn't afraid of big dogs.
Sometimes, a little doggie therapy can mend a sad girl's heart.
Today's weather high was 90 degrees!!! It's only 4 days into May and we are already at 90 degrees--crazy! I'm wondering if these are signs of us going to have a sweltering heated summer.
Today, I spent the early afternoon with the BFF. She was craving sushi and I couldn't say no! Plus, I wanted to try out some DavePops at our local farmer's market.
They are nothing like the icy popsicles that you buy at the grocery store. The texture is smoothie like--thick and creamy, which I later found out is how they are actually made--just like a smoothie! Oh, and they are not bad in the nutrition department. About 100 calories per pop and they are made of whole fruits, juices, and some are made with soy or nut milks. I saw that some are made with soda drinks and energy drinks, but I didn't try those out at all. A Red bull pop doesn't sound appealing.
I needed this day out. Still waiting on my impending AF and I must say it's pure torture. I wished that it would just come already and not tease me with some brown spotting bs.
It already feels like summer is here on the west coast. The weather has been nothing but gorgeous. All I have to say, is keep the sun shining!
Last night's dinner was some yummy chicken with asparagus and mushroom stir fry compliments of Mr. Dubyah. I always tease him that since his ethnicity is Chinese that he makes the BEST stir fry ever. Hah!
Since I was feeling kinda down because of my impending AF, we indulged after dinner and went out for some family ice cream at a local creamery called, Leatherby's. I just wanted a scoop of my favorite flavor, toasted almond.
Even Maddie got in on some family ice cream. We bought her favorite peanut butter and banana ice cream cup. It's an organic dog ice cream called Yoghound.
She always seems to know when we buy it that it's her "special" treat. I love that! I can tell that she loves it because usually when a dog passes by, she'll try and greet them, but when she's busy licking away on her ice cream, she pays no attention to them. Oh Maddie, you are so funny!!!
I went to pee today and right when I wiped, I saw "it." You all know what I'm talking about. Your heart sinks. Your mind kinda goes blank and all it could think is, "why?"
and just like that.... in a mere few seconds, you are right back to square one.
F.
Pineapple.
Hah, my word that keeps me calm--pineapple. Learned this funny technique from a friend who recently saw the up and coming comedian, Kevin Hart. In his show, he talked about how whenever he's in a complicated situation or irritated with soemthing, he says the word "pineapple" over and over and over to get him to his calm place.
So, I've adopted it. Pineapple. Does it work? Nope. But it makes me forget just for a quick second how sad I am.
Planning on doing the wait n' see if it truly is here. Who am I kidding? It is, just gotta make sure it's a flow and then I make the call for yet another ultrasound.
I had a very relaxing weekend this past weekend. I got to spend the day with some of my closest girlfriends, aka, "PLC" (Puma Love Club) at the spa and then have a very indulgent dinner at Tyler Florence's restaurant, Wayfare Tavern.
One thing we wished we did was have earlier appointments so that we could use the amenities much much longer. So, what do we do? We plan for our next spa day in a month!
We spent majority of our day at Burke Williams Spa in San Francisco. Its located inside the mall which is a girl's dream to be in a spa surrounded by all sorts of stores.
They think of everything to have from the facial moisturizer, makeup remover, to the curling and flat irons and hairdryers. You really don't have to bring anything from home except your swimsuit and change of clothes.
Dinner was pretty exciting as we were hoping and praying that Mr. Ultimate himself would show. Unfortunately, he was a no show as he recently opened two other restaurants. One in Mill Valley and the other in Napa and so his time is split up between all three restaurants. Boo.
The husband surprised all of us by purchasing a bottle of some yummy Prosecco in celebration of our friend's upcoming nuptials and birthday. Awwwww :)I was a very proud wifey, needless to say.
The food was good, but to be honest, I wasn't blow away by it. I did enjoy my 48 hour cooked pot roast and the fresh green peas that were sprinkled about. Look how ginormous those green peas are!
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